Three Retirees

Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were playing golf. One remarked to the other, "Windy, isn't it?"

"No," the second man replied, "it's Thursday."

The third man chimed in, "So am I. Let's have a beer."

6 or 9 volts?

An elderly couple was attending church services, about halfway through she leans over and says, "I just had a silent fart, what do you think I should do?"

He replies, "Put a new battery in your hearing aid."