Tech Support: Please right click on the open desktop.
Customer: OK.
Tech Support: Did you get the pop-up menu?
Customer: No.
Tech Support: OK. Can you tell me what you have done up to this point?
Customer: You told me to write "click." I did and nothing happened.
Showing posts with label Tech Support Calls. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Tech Support Calls. Show all posts
Head of the Household
A couple incurred several problems while assembling their new computer system, so they called the help desk. The man on the phone started to talk to the husband in computer jargon, which confused him even more.
"Sir," the husband politely said, "please explain what I should do as if I were a four-year-old."
"Okay," the computer technician replied. "Son, could you please put your mommy on the phone?"
"Sir," the husband politely said, "please explain what I should do as if I were a four-year-old."
"Okay," the computer technician replied. "Son, could you please put your mommy on the phone?"
Jack's Number
Attributed to Samsung Electronics
Caller: Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?
Operator: I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about.
Caller: On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?
Operator: I think it means the telephone plug on the wall.
Caller: Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?
Operator: I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about.
Caller: On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?
Operator: I think it means the telephone plug on the wall.
Right Click
Tech Support: I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop.
Customer: OK.
Tech Support: Did you get a pop-up menu?
Customer: No.
Tech Support: OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?'
Customer: No.
Tech Support: OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?'
Customer: Sure. You told me to write 'click' twice so I have written 'click' twice now.
Customer: OK.
Tech Support: Did you get a pop-up menu?
Customer: No.
Tech Support: OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?'
Customer: No.
Tech Support: OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?'
Customer: Sure. You told me to write 'click' twice so I have written 'click' twice now.
Remote Vision
Tech Support: At the bottom left hand side of your screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?
Customer: Wow! How can you see my screen from there?
Customer: Wow! How can you see my screen from there?
Turning Back the System Clock
"I deleted a file from my PC last week and I just realized that I need it. So, if I turn my system clock back two weeks will I get my file back again?"
A Real Life ID 10 T User Error
This is claimed to be an actual dialogue from the WordPerfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Judging from the content, it has to have occurred during the mid 1980s, making it a classic.
Operator: Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?
Caller: Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.
Operator: What sort of trouble?
Caller: Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.
Operator: Went away?
Caller: They disappeared.
Operator: Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?
Caller: Nothing.
Operator: Nothing?
Caller: It's blank, it won't accept anything when I type.
Operator: Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?
Caller: How do I tell?
Operator: Can you see the 'C: prompt' on the screen?
Caller: What's a sea-prompt?
Operator: Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?
Caller: There isn't any cursor; I told you, it won't accept anything I type.
Operator: Does your monitor have a power indicator?
Caller: What's a monitor?
Operator: It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?
Caller: I don't know.
Operator: Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?
Caller: Yes, I think so.
Operator: Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
Caller: Yes, it is.
Operator: When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?
Caller: No.
Operator: Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable.
Caller: Okay, here it is.
Operator: Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer.
Caller: I can't reach.
Operator: OK. Well, can you see if it is?
Caller: No.
Operator: Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?
Caller: Well, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark.
Operator: Dark?
Caller: Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.
Operator: Well, turn on the office light then.
Caller: I can't.
Operator: No? Why not?
Caller: Because there's a power failure.
Operator: A power... A power failure? Aha. Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff that your computer came in?
Caller: Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.
Operator: Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.
Caller: Really? Is it that bad?
Operator: Yes, I'm afraid it is.
Caller: Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?'
Operator: Tell them you're too damned stupid to own a computer!
Operator: Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?
Caller: Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.
Operator: What sort of trouble?
Caller: Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.
Operator: Went away?
Caller: They disappeared.
Operator: Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?
Caller: Nothing.
Operator: Nothing?
Caller: It's blank, it won't accept anything when I type.
Operator: Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?
Caller: How do I tell?
Operator: Can you see the 'C: prompt' on the screen?
Caller: What's a sea-prompt?
Operator: Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?
Caller: There isn't any cursor; I told you, it won't accept anything I type.
Operator: Does your monitor have a power indicator?
Caller: What's a monitor?
Operator: It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?
Caller: I don't know.
Operator: Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?
Caller: Yes, I think so.
Operator: Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
Caller: Yes, it is.
Operator: When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?
Caller: No.
Operator: Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable.
Caller: Okay, here it is.
Operator: Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer.
Caller: I can't reach.
Operator: OK. Well, can you see if it is?
Caller: No.
Operator: Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?
Caller: Well, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark.
Operator: Dark?
Caller: Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.
Operator: Well, turn on the office light then.
Caller: I can't.
Operator: No? Why not?
Caller: Because there's a power failure.
Operator: A power... A power failure? Aha. Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff that your computer came in?
Caller: Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.
Operator: Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.
Caller: Really? Is it that bad?
Operator: Yes, I'm afraid it is.
Caller: Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?'
Operator: Tell them you're too damned stupid to own a computer!
Hello Operator
An actual call center conversation -
Customer: I've been calling 700-1000 for two days and can't get through; can you help?'
Operator: Where did you get that number, sir?
Customer: It's on the door of your business.
Operator: Sir, those are the hours that we are open.
Customer: I've been calling 700-1000 for two days and can't get through; can you help?'
Operator: Where did you get that number, sir?
Customer: It's on the door of your business.
Operator: Sir, those are the hours that we are open.
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